He gave us life so that we might seek and know Him.

   Today, I'm thinking about the joy of service to God.  This week-end was very encouraging.

   I read this morning that George Bernard Shaw wrote, "This is true joy in life, the being used up for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; (I add "it doesn't have to be big or famous but never the less a calling from God or obedience to His Word).  Shaw continues, "the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy."  I like that.  That's what we do.  Isn't it?  We can so easily become self absorbed.

   Francis Chan adds in his book "Crazy Love," God is the only true Giver and He needs nothing from from us.  But still he wants us.  He gave us life so that we might seek and know Him."  That's both very humbling and very encouraging because He loves us and yes, we are called to be his ambassadors to the world and obey His Word, but we can't say, 

"Look at everything I do for God."

   We need the love from God to love and serve others and be ambassadors and obey His Word, but not for His sake.  It's for our sake.  Even loving God is for our sake.  The Holy Spirit was a gift to help us and our repentance and faith allows us to draw close to our awesome God.  I am so grateful!

Praising God for another day and the beauty 
of his creation.

Whatever is true, whatever is noble,

Whatever is right, whatever is pure

Whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable or praise worthy,

Think about such things.

Whatever you have learned or received or 

heard from me or seen in me,

Put it into practice and the God of peace

Will be with you.  

Philippians 4:8

   For God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind.  2 Tim 1:7


   Rejoice in expectation:  the hope of heaven is more wonderful than we can fathom and if we suffer righteously during this life, God will use even that to shower us w/ blessings.


   But the fruit of the Spirit is love, peace, patience kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  Against such things, there is no law.  Galatians 5:22-23


   I'm reading several good non-fiction Christian books now.  My church is doing "Crazy Love" together (great book).  A few of us are reading "The Disciple of Grace" and I'm reading "Crave" and a few books about the "Moral Compass" and the "Addictive Personality."  My addictive personality has landed on food for the last few years and I've really struggled with using sugar products for comfort.  I'm one of the leaders in a "Chemical Recovery" group at my church and haven't smoked in 10 years and gave up pain meds as well.  It was recommended by another leader that I write another journal and attend an OA meeting (overeaters anonymous).  The 12 steps and others with the same challenges will be good for me...9:00 a.m.  Sugar does serious damage to my health and I need to finally and completely surrender it to God and realize I'm out of control...steps 1 and 2.  We'll see what happens because on my own, I failed again this week. There are two great sisters in our Fredrick church who have given up sugar.  I need to talk with them, too.
   Have a blessed day, breathe deeply, relax, and give your worries to the Lord.

Fransoddsandends: Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their stre...

Fransoddsandends: Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their stre...: Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not grow w...

 Those who wait on the Lord 

shall renew their strength.

They shall mount up with wings like eagles.

They shall run and not grow weary.

They shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:30

Still taking pictures from my art journal

and words of encouragement I wrote in the little book I made myself in a time of great discouragement and depression.  I love this verse.  It really helps me especially as I get older but I'm going to start exercising again, today.  I always walk my dog but today I'll ride my bike and do my back/ab strengtheners and stretches.  That makes a huge difference in how I feel physically and emotionally.

"Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."  Matthew 5:10




   Jesus goes on to say in the next verse, "Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.  Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."
   This is the hardest of the beatitudes for me.  Sometimes, others think I take my christianity too far but I've never been truly persecuted for it.  We live in a country where we, Christians,  enjoy freedom of religion but people of different religions are often badly treated.  In other countries, Christians continue to be persecuted, imprisoned, disowned by their families and even killed.  
   Would I deny Jesus in these situations?  My first and last reaction would be no but then I study Peter who swore he could never be capable of that and yet he did, 3 times.  I must test my faith and ponder my response and finally,  I can rejoice in what Jesus has revealed to me that enables me not just to exit but to truly live and rejoice in the power and joy of his resurrection.  Following Jesus has pulled me out of the pit of worldly sin and the casual sin that the world has come to accept.
   Would you still follow Jesus, if you were faced with torture, death, or family rejection?  Yes, I will but I hope I never have to face torture and death.  Many of us have already experienced family rejection because of our zeal and passion for following Jesus. But as I look at the world, I know that it is worth it. 

Blessed are the peace makers for they will be called sons (and daughters) of God.  Matthew 5:9


What would you put in the windows and door of this church?  I continue to study the beatitudes but my heart is challenged today.  I have envisioned children waving from these windows which is why I have a heart for teaching and writing for children.   And so I write,  even if no one reads, it helps me to cling to God and share his love no matter how I'm feeling today.

• Jesus said that we would have challenges in this life and wouldn't always understand.  God is beyond our understanding but if we trust him, we will have peace.  His loving hand is our anchor, Jesus, our salvation and the Bible and Holy Spirit our guide.
• "Jesus is Lord."  This surrender to Jesus will give us the assurance of God's help whatever hardship we face as we share his amazing message.  I have found the most valuable knowledge in the world, yet I struggle to share it.  I have felt so much rejection in my life.  Help me, Lord, to share anyway.
• Today, I wrestle with an addiction to sugar that I must conquer before I'm officially a diabetic and obese with a stroke or heart attack.  God calls me to care for the "temple" that he has given me and so, I need so much help in overcoming this addiction.  I must turn to God and my Christian friends for help and take this very, very seriously.  Yet, there are only 4 of us in the CR ministry of my county's church.  Why so few?  What's your addiction?  What do you turn to in times of anxiety and trouble?
• I've been feeling  deeply the grief of losing family and being misunderstood and rejected by them.    I loved, I cared and I tried to protect.  I offered help and it was rejected.  I tried to protect and was misunderstood.  Help me figure out what I did wrong and how to love and forgive despite how I've been hurt.
• I pray for  additional income (piano students and gigs) to support my retirement.  My health is better but I still have to make a schedule that I can handle and survive on.  
• I feel insecurity in the calling I have sensed from God to write, compose and record books and music for children.  "Who am I?"  I question my abilities, my character and sometimes my very sanity.  I love you Jesus.  Here I am, Lord, send me.  I'm listening.  

Mary, mother of Jesus

"Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God."


   The only way I can be pure in heart is to allow the Holy Spirit to work in me.  I have repented and been baptized, so, now continuing to study the Bible helps me see Jesus as he was here on  earth.  To imitate Christ and to reveal him to others in my words and actions is not easy.  That's why he gave us the Holy Spirit when we chose to follow him.
   I know that "WWJD" is wide spread, but do we really know "what Jesus would do."  I read about him and study him.  I find his character from his words and deeds in the Bible.  i.e. He healed the sick, shared his love of God, fed the poor, cared for the widows, and he demonstrated obedience to God.  He never sinned.  He was gentle with the woman at the well and the adulteress but make no mistake, he told them what they must do, change.  He saw the hypocrites for what they were.  He wept........  
   I pray to have the same zeal and passion for the things Jesus cared about.  He never said that it would be easy but we have been given all the tools that we need. 
   His last words to us was to go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them and teaching them all that he taught.  (Matthew 28)  It sounds like the best answer for this crazy hurting world and I want to be one who works for that change.
   

"Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy."  Matthew 5:7

   Today, I think of a dear friend who's husband just up and left her and her three young children.  I won't presume to know what in the world he was thinking for Jesus calls me to have mercy.  But, I ache for his wife, left with 3 children and a broken heart.  Yes, I know that broken heart that feels like it will actually break and be torn from your body.  
   But, this friend loves God and has raised her children to love God.  She is beautiful and talented and even through her tears, she is strong in the Lord.  Her heart is good, soft and strong enough to not only raise her son and daughter but adopt a child with many needs and requiring patience, prayer and even more love.  She was strong enough to let the man she loved explore all his "boyish" dreams even when it meant staying home alone, waiting all night, long after her children were asleep.  
   She has a heart big enough for many, many friends that love her and ache for her, now in her need.  God, I know you will be merciful to that family and love them through it all.  I can't help but pray the hardest for her and her children even though he is so lost to think hormones and mid-life crisis mean "love."  No, staying with your family is love, the hard kind, the good kind, the kind that God gives us.  I hope he wakes up and realizes before it's too late that he's really going to regret this.  I pray that she will be greatly blessed and favored, Lord.  Hold her and love her and fill that place in the heart that only you can fill, anyway.

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteous, for they will be filled."  Matthew 5:6


It is through the grace of God, that we can even aspire toward righteousness.

• Acknowledge that life is meaningless without God.
• Read the Bible, hunger for its teachings and inspiration.
• Put God's Word into practice, and celebrate the freedom that comes from building our lives on the "Rock."

This is a drawing I did for my Dad's book that I made him.  It went with the page for the song, "I'll Fly Away."  I miss you Dad but now I can talk to you every day.

1. 

"Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth."  Matthew 5:5

• Trust God completely; affirm what he "has done  for us" already and decide to trust him for the future.
• Turn control over to God, knowing his plan for us is absolutely perfect and that all things happen just as he decided long ago.
• Be totally confident that God will protect us-that even if we experience pain and loss, he will be right there giving us the strength to survive and grow through the experience.

This does not mean we are to be a "doormat."  If we are truly "in Christ and Christ in us,"  we have the power, love, strength, talent, peace, faith and self-control through our Savior.  To God Be The Gory.

" Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted."
Matthew 5:4

These pictures are from a book that I made for my Dad a month before his death.  It contained favorite hymns, verses and art to comfort him after he found out that he had stage 4 cancer.

Yes, Jesus did comfort me and my father.  He led me to my father's bedside to pray and comfort him in his last 3 days on earth.  My sorrow was indescribable.  He died at 3:00 a.m. on Saturday morning, Sept. 25, 2010.  I returned to Md. the next day to mourn with my family.  He was my last remaining parent, my children's last remaining grandparent.  My mother had died many years ago.

But again, this particular part of Jesus' sermon was referring to being vulnerable, recognizing and acknowledging our sin...mourning the sin that hurts us, others and God.  The Bible helps us identify particular sin and encourages us to confess our sins to one another and repent.

There is great joy when we repent not only to Jesus who bore our
sins but to our brothers and sisters in Christ.

"find out what pleases the Lord."  Ephesians 5:10

"Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of God."
Matthew 5:3


I used to think that this meant Christians were supposed to be very sad, serious, with no self confidence.


Now I call these the beatitudes of JOY!


Jesus is speaking of our dependence on him for our best in life. ..to be humble enough to realize how much we need him, to take pride in his gifts to us and be utterly grateful for his ultimate gift.


Yes, I eagerly seek God and believe that if I keep trusting God and seeking his way, I will find the fullness of life that he promises.  We, as Christians and disciples of Jesus have every reason to be joyful in spite of circumstances.  Because Jesus took the consequences of our sin, we can come before God in his holiness.  We no longer have to sin for we are not under the power of evil.  We're still human and yes, we still need Jesus and his forgiveness, but do not have to be slaves to sin and are free to grow in character and all the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

Pick-me-ups

Today, I scanned directly from the little book that I made myself and carried in my purse.  I wanted you to see what it looks like.  All the pages are different and I had fun making it.  That's part of it's power, too.  

These are all things I could pick from to "pick-me-up."

Organize studio desk and closet is one that's harder but once I get into it, I always feel better.

Hopefully, this will give you some ideas or remind you of ones you already knew.  Have a great, fabulous, stupendous and wonderful day and smile more:)

      "PTSD"
post traumatic stress disorder
                     or
Loving the Beach
       Again. 






I like jazz and the Rolling Stones,
Playing with others, playing alone.
I can play every instrument except trombone
But my kidnapper played the saxophone.
I love the piano, I've struggled with violin
I bought myself a trumpet
And sold it again.




I love the beach, haven't been for years
It brings back nightmares and terrifying fears.
But, I'll envision Georgie in his adventure by the sea
I sure hope he loves it as much as me.
The bruises are gone, rape was the crime
Kidnapping is brutal, the memories, still mine.
But, surf and sand will cool my toes;
Sun and wind will burn my nose.
I'll be cleansing my spirit of the vicious past,
Finding real freedom, at long, long last.
Loving the beach, again.

I Like...

An "I like....poem" is another way of feeling gratitude and concentrating on the positive.  I wrote this in a very difficult time.

I like purple, music and poetry.

I like horses, dogs and cats.

I like books and time to read,

Mystery, Christian, stuff like that.

I like James and Chris and wearing God's ring.
I like to paint, and play and sing.

I like to eat but not to cook. 

 It shows on me, when I look. 

 I like to paint and draw and stuff, 

Watch movies when my life gets tough.  

I like to dance and laugh with friends.

Georgie and Riff are two loyal friends.  

They love me no matter what I look like and snuggle with me every night.

I say my prayers and read my Bible.  I go to church, more as I'm able.

I'm loving retirement and hope to travel.

But best of all, I'll be a grandmother.

I'll carry on a fine tradition of teaching them stories and Bible verses.

I'll write them songs about God's love and tell about my own grandmother. 

Mom and Dad, they all loved God.

One day, I'll be in heaven with God, 
But we'll always be watching and singing our love.

I love you so much before you're even born,
I love my kids at church, too
 and I leave you these gifts:
My faith and songs and stories 'bout God.
God Bless You!             Grandma Fran

Fransoddsandends: Laughter A laugh is a smile that bursts.Smile. S...

Fransoddsandends:
Laughter
A laugh is a smile that bursts.Smile. S...: Laughter A laugh is a smile that bursts. Smile. Sunshine is good for your teeth. He who laughs, lasts. Laughter is the sun t...

Laughter

A laugh is a smile that bursts.

Smile.  Sunshine is good for your teeth.

He who laughs, lasts.

Laughter is the sun that drives winter from your face.

The earth laughs in flowers - eecummings

Do it often!  Research shows that it's healing.

Fransoddsandends: God Is Always Watching Over ...

Fransoddsandends: God Is Always Watching Over
...: God Is Always Watching Over Us! "He brought me out to a wide open place; He rescued me because He deligh...

Creativity


   May I always have the freedom and opportunity to express myself creatively.  I can be who I want to be and was made to be.
   When I need reassurance, God will turn my fears into faith and my doubts into trust. 
Creativity is my birthright in Jesus, and I love it!  
   Today, I will stand in wondrous awe at His creativity and know that I am created in His image.  I will look forward to the day that I can hear him singing over me (Zephaniah 3:17) and hear the unimaginable music that he creates.  But for now, I am happy to use even a small portion of that creativity He gave me and use it for his glory.  

God Is Always Watching Over       
                    Us!


   "He brought me out to a wide open place;
He rescued me because He delights in me."  Psalm 18:19


   When life overwhelms me and I feel like I can't carry on, I hold out my hand to God.  He always gives me strength and walks beside me when I think I can't walk another step.  God has carried me through life's trials;  He will help me make it through this day and all those to come ...And He is always watching me. 
   Have a blessed day.

This is one of my motivational wheels.  I love doing these because it
helps me get things done if  I take them in small steps. To start recording'
I had to just turn my speakers around.  The next day, I got a huge box
of messy cables and sorted and wrapped them.  One slice of the circle is
just plugging equipment in.  You get the idea.

Happiness


The things you do on purpose, what you give your attention too, what you give your energy to and what goes on inside of you have the power to make you happy.
Dr. Henry Cloud says,
"happy people: are givers, are not lazy about happiness, don't wait  for someday, pursue goals, fully engage, connect, don't compare themselves, think well, are grateful, have boundaries, forgive, have a calling and have FAITH.

A New "To Do" List

• Kiss or hug someone today.
• Take a nap or 10 min. power nap
• Do something you love.
• Spend time with your pets.
• Unclutter one small area.
• Organize something even if it's just a drawer.
• Journal (I love art journaling!)
• Simplify your life, in one way, today
• Downsize.  Give stuff to a charity.  We don't need so much stuff!
• Take a walk and enjoy the sky, trees, leaves and flowers .  Take pictures.  Praise God for being so creative...pray and sing and glorify our awesome God!  
• Pick one or two.  "KISS"  Keep it simple

Stress
Behavioral Symptoms

Our society is filled with stress.  Many have lost jobs, lost health care, have health problems, lost their homes, and  lost loved ones.  The list goes on.  My first "go-to" is prayer and reading the living Word of God.  But here are a few symptoms.  These are ones that I personally have experienced but they match up with many resources that I have researched on the topic:  compulsive eating, chronic fatigue, feeling closed in and desiring to run, isolating (don't want to leave home), waking up at 3:00 a.m., being self destructive (I hacked off my hair), self-medicating ( this can include food, legal or illegal drugs, alcohol, and even shopping.)  My greatest recent challenge has been with food but it can be anything you go to  in order to feel better or "shut everything out."  
   I'm "putting myself out there" in hopes that I may help others.  You are not alone.  That's what this blog is about.  Get medical help but please talk to God...read the Bible...yes it is still valid, authentic and works in our hearts and minds to heal us.

Stress
Mental and Emotional

1.  Depression
2.  Anxiety
3.  Frequent crying
4.  Nightmares
5.  Self-defeating thoughts
6.  Loss of memory
7.  Social withdrawal
8.  Feeling overwhelmed




This is just a few of the things that I scan myself for when I'm working too many hours, not sleeping and often not eating healthy or drinking enough water.  If you have PTSD or suffer from any other mental health issue like major depression,  it's even more important for you to stay in tune with your body, mind, emotions and behavior.

Stress-physical symptoms


   Muscle tension, dry mouth, chronic fatigue, weight gain, nausea, excessive sweating,
backaches, increased appetite, headaches, nervous tics, rashes, dizziness, frequent colds and flus, being accident prone and having high blood pressure are a few.  
   Are you taking walks, stretching and taking "time-out" from tasks.  Have you tried power naps or meditation during your day.  Exercise, though you may feel tired is an excellent "stress reliever" but start slow or you'll cause more stress.
   Have you tried starting your day with prayer or silence to recognize God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit in your life?  Have you tried making that part of your whole day, always aware of his guiding hand and the spirit within you? 
   All of my blogs, so far, have used art journal drawings and entries from a book that I made myself and carried with me to remind myself of things that would help a very challenging time in my life.  I sincerely hope that you find something for yourself, here.  Thanks for visiting.

Depression odds&ends


   Some foods are truly depressing!  New research shows that regularly consuming transfats (often present in fast foods and pastries) and saturated fats (found in fast food, whole milk and red meat) increase the risk of depression by 48%.  Olive oil on the other hand protects against depression.  So does exercise, by the way.
   I remind myself regularly that my thoughts effect my feelings which effect my actions, so I'm careful what I think about and attempt to project a positive future.  Your body will believe you if you project a negative future and it will give you that.
   The greatest honor we can give God is to live gladly because of the knowledge of his love-Julian of Abrwich.  When we believe him and trust him, he often steps in and blesses us.  He's always with us, so like my art journal says, live out loud and dream out loud and expect the positive.
   

Depression

Depression


Know a person as a person, not by their mental illness.

• They are your friends, neighbors and family.
• They improve and recover
• They are major contributors to life
• They deserve dignity and respect.
• They may also suffer from PTSD which they can learn to cope with but not cure.

Depressed people have a high tolerance for suffering and do not care for themselves.  Often, they can't sleep.  They're sick a lot.  Their immune system is compromised.  If you think you are depressed, seek medical help.

"He is mighty to save.  He takes great delight in me.  He will quiet me with his love.  He rejoices over me with singing." 

 Zephaniah 3:17

Anxiety

Anxiety/Fear


"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares."  1Peter 5:1




Scriptures are my first "go to."  But I learned this little tip for when you're in the middle of feeling anxious.

1. Look around the room and identify 3 things.
2. Take 3 deep breaths:  "in" to a count of 4, hold for 4 and out 4.
3. Take a drink of water.
4. Think of 3 things you love to do.

                              Energy


I used to have so much energy but as I got older and busier, I became over-whelmed by fatigue.  Here is a list I put in my book to remind me of what helps.

• Sleep, nap or power nap
• Eat healthy.  Junk made me tired.
• Hydrate....water, water!
• 
  
• Exercise, stretch and have good posture
• Drink green tea
• Include plants, bright colors, flowers, pictures and peppermint oil in your work area.
• Plan for fun:  paint, read, walk, play or listen to music, spend time w/ friends and dance.
• Breathe correctly i.e. deep, slow abdominal breathing
• Get some sun, daily and take extra vitamin D
• Rub your ears
• Splash cool water on your face
• Pop a peppermint
• Massage your feet
• Find out about "Flow" if you don't know.  Have a great day.

Faith


   I created a little song for myself.  The words are "God is walking with me, Jesus saved my soul, the Holy Spirit prays with me."
   God has pulled me out and lifted me up so many times that I have complete confidence in him.  He has been a father and a mother to me.  Since I repented of my sin and was baptized, I read the Bible every day.  I am blessed with a family of believers that are "THERE" for me.  We serve one another, encourage one another and obey the "Word" of God.  Jesus said, "If you love me, you will obey."  In a world of such decadence, evil, greed, lust, war, genocide and disasters, God is our only Hope.  Hold to him with love, praise, gratitude and obedience.  

Visualization


   Visualize your day, your event, your future and your happiness in a positive way and with detail.
   Visualize your favorite things to do.
                                                                      Visualize your dreams!  
   O course, God never promised that it will always be easy or that we will always get what we dream.  I trust him to know what's best even when I don't understand it.  He has a plan and he is faithful! 


   I knew that I had an Italian half brother when I was 5.  He first started writing to me in my 20's.  In my early 50's, I was able to connect with an Italian school, teach there, and finally meet my brother.  My school taught free Italian lessons to staff members and by the time I went to Italy, I could "hold my own" in Italian.  My dream was to meet him and most importantly have him meet his father and finally understand that his father loved him.  "Not a day went by that I didn't think of you," my father told him.           And I wanted him to understand that poverty and circumstances kept them apart.  Here we are, finally together.  I was 60 and my brother 64.  Dad was 83.  Inspite of being born a poor coalminer's daughter, my dream finally came true.  Many others have come true but this was one for my brother.  To God Be The Glory.

A Meditation


Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.  Where there is hatred, let me sow love.  Where there is injury, pardon.  Where there is doubt, faith.  Where there is despair, hope.  Where there is darkness, light.  Where there is sadness, joy.  O, Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;  to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love.  For it is in giving that we receive.  It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.  It is in dying to self, that we are born again to Eternal Life.  Amen
Prayer of St. Francis
  When I meditate and pray, I stretch, breathe deeply, and relax.  I think that always helps me.  This prayer or meditation covers a lot of areas in my character. I hope you know that God does hear us.  "For if you seek Him, you will find him."

Today's topic from my book that I made for myself during a difficult time is:
                 Generosity

Give of my time, my talents, my money, my love, my wisdom, my smile, my faith, my compassion, my forgiveness, my knowledge and share the Word of God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.